The pizzas are small and sparsely garnished.

My husband and I checked out House Pizzeria tonight for the first time . . . while the two pizzas we ordered (pepperoni & 'the subterranean') were pretty good for Austin standards, we were unimpressed with the service, and pretty much everything else that happened to be going on in that building at the time.

We were instructed to enter through the back door, adjacent to the parking lot, by an on-break employee. He said it was the 'main entrance.'

Upon entering, we were confronted with the restrooms, and the lines for those restroooms, immediately. And from that vantage point, no part of that restaurant made sense.

That door was not, in fact, the main entrance.

We found a table and made our way to the front counter (immediately adjacent to the actual main entrance) to order . . . two pizzas and a bottle of wine. . . Yay, we'd love to sit and wait for the magic to happen . . . and we've heard lots of good things about this place.

So excited! Yay!

And then it began . . . the server/runner dropped off an opened/recorked bottle of wine, the one we'd ordered, with two tumblers.

Great, right? I love the European style of drinking inexpensive table wines out of short, fat, rocks glasses, especially in warm weather. And I have zero qualms about pouring my own wine, I actually prefer it.

So we poured a splash each of the wine to check it out . . . totally 'corked'.

And I don't mean in the way that you're wondering "is this corked?" I mean in the way that you immediately want to throw out the glass itself.

Nobody's fault, but it needs to go away. I returned to the front counter and alerted the waitstaff/counterstaff that the bottle was corked, and ordered a different bottle as a replacement.*

From our view (open kitchen and bar), not only did no one on the staff, including the owner/chef, that night understand what "corked" meant, but they proceeded to drink the nasty corked bottle in front of us, and to mock our decision to return the bottle.

It's a small place, and we could hear and see everything that was going on.

In short. . . if you are going to hang up your shingle and charge people for your food and wine, you'd better make sure you know some basics . . .

1. 'Corked' wine is a real thing, it does not mean that there are pieces of cork in the bottle, it means that the wine has been tainted and affected by a bacteria present in the cork, and if you do not know this, you should probably go BYOB. And you should probably have your liquor license revoked.

for some basic info: http://www.foodandwine.com/articles/learning-to-sniff-out-corked-wine

2. People go out to dinner for food, but also for the experience. Don't screw it up if you can help it. All it takes is a little effort. Very little effort. If you make fun of guests where they can see and hear you, you can be very assured that they will not come back, that they will tell everyone the know that your place sucks, and finally, that you are so not ready to have your own business.

3. The percentage of people who complain, or return, an item is ridiculously small compared to the percentage of people who are unsatisfied in a restaurant setting.

4. When someone makes the effort to let you know what they think, take it seriously. That person cares enough to give you another chance. Most people just won't come back. Quietly.

In short . . . we liked the pizza, it wasn't great. The wine selection was totally fine for the setting, but obviously we were bothered by being able to view the staff mocking us for returning a very corked wine, as they drank said wine. Yuck. Bleck.

A final tip for restauranteurs: when a customer returns a wine for being 'corked,' save the bottle, including the wine (no one should have to drink that), and alert the vendor the next time you do business with them. A 'corked' bottle is no one's fault. You will receive a credit or a replacement, the vendor will do the same from the importer, and the importer will alert the producer.

Just as it goes with food in a restaurant, everyone benefits from legitimate complaints being handled responsibly. The restauranteur is refunded, and the producer is alerted of quality issues with regard to production and corkage.

If you're going to do it, do it right. Please.